Alphabetisize!…………….V!

  Im sure ive got URBAN HYMNS still sitting around the house, somewhere, although i know the case for the cd is long gone, and im sure with a little bit of searching i’ll eventually come across it. Anyway, apart from that, ive got the VERVEs first two cds as well as the best of that was released a few years ago. And their new one is on my list to get when i have a spare bit of cash.

   As i briefly mentioned earlier me and my mate colin ssaw the band at the Barrowlands around the time Urban Hymns was just coming out. Another drunken night, where one of the girls was sick in the hall that was with us and then tried to grab anyone she could to dance with her for the whole gig. There was plenty room around where she was standing but this was really only beacause she had spewed on the floor. We also popped into Bairds bar before hand, the rough and ready Celtic pub right next door to the old dancehall. Coloured top to bottom in green and full of mean looking bruisers its nearly enough to put you off leaving the house ever again, but as usual when it comes to scotland and drinking, common sense usually takes a back seat so our drunken escapades that night included the two girls staggering up to the pool table, slamming change down and demanding they were up for a game next, while real life headbanges in vests in the middle of december looked on bewilderdly and also colin swirling a purse round his finger with no care as to how this looks to the average person at the bar before it finally came flying off and shot across the room until it slapped someone in the face. Never a dull moment.

   Oh yeah, and one of the girls fell down the stairs so had to stagger along to the train station while we shot ahead to get a well deserved bucket of KFC.

   “Im a vegetarian!” declared one of the girls, hungerly as we offered her some chips before her sister reached into her pocket, brought out a couple of pound and slammed in on the train table before launching into the bucket for a piece of chicken “fuck vegitarians” she shouted, “im bloody starvin!”.

  Theres the classic 1984 album from Van Halen as well as a double greatest hits, and two cds from VAST, which if i remember off hand stands for VISUAL AUDIO SENSORY THEATRE, or something like that. Very good stuff, where they mix heavy guitars with those mad monks that do all the chanting.

   And ive got two cds by the VINES, and also saw the group when they played an early gig at the QMU in Glasgow. Mainman craig already showed a hint of insanity when we caught him, sitting on the stairs watching the support act, PETE YORN, while hitting his empty plastic water bottle off his head. Then when playing, he kept making bizarre, funny rock poses and stuff and also jumping into the crowd, mid-solo without missing a note. A complete crackpot.

  The debut album this year from VAMPIRE WEEKEND is excellent, and ive managed to catch the band twice now. Theyve been wowing the fans at all the big festivals this year and also saw them more recently at the Barrowlands, where they even did an excellent cover of Fleetwood Macs ‘EVERYWHERE’.

  As for last years debut cd from the VIEW, apart from a couple of singles theres nothing really to write home about, i seriously dont see what the big fuss is about these guys.

  Finish off the letter V with two best of’s that couldnt be anymore different if they tried.

   One is a collection of songs from the legendary VELVET UNDERGROUND and the other is from those eternal fancy dress partyers the VILLAGE PEOPLE.

  All i can say is that ive never, drunkenly, stood in the middle of a dancefloor/pub/middle of the street and did manic hand dance movements to the Velvet Underground. Im sure most of you guys out there would say the same thing (apart from probably DAVE!) which means that although this band is the essence of coolness, if it came down to it we would all secretly pick the Village People.

Alphabetisize!………………..U!

  Another section which should take no time at all to run through and should also be, hopefully, fairly painless as theres less than half a dozen artists under the letter U.

  Way out in front is U2 where ive managed to count about 13 cds, which include the two double best of’s and a live bootleg cd i picked up in Ibiza one year the same time i found Duran Duran Unplugged. In fact i think ive got all their cds except from October and Rattle And Hum.

    I know its easy to hate U2, ‘biggest band in the world’, and all that, but i quite like them and the twice ive seen them have been up there with some of the best gigs ive ever been to.

   Parkhead was good, although we were raging after fighting our way to get close to the front we then were confronted by the horrific prospect of watching the Utah Saints, live. Thats a bollocks statement right there if there ever was one. Live my arse, its all a bunch of pre-programmed shit. So we buggered off for a walk then took up residence at the other end of the stadium, on the terraces and enjoyed every moment from there. I remember big burning crosses on the screen while they were doing ‘BULLET THE BLUE SKY’. A song we found could be hummed along to almost half of the verve live set we witnessed years ago at the Barrowlands.

   The other time was at Murrayfield when they were touring their POP album. By their own accounts, this is nowhere near their best album, its full of good songs that werent totally realised properly at the time (theyve actually said at various times that they would like to go back one day and redo the album) but live they took on a new lease of life.

  The live show was spectacular, with one of the biggest screens ive ever seen on stage, i remember then doing ‘MIAMI’ to a cartoon backdrop of palm trees being blown away by hurricanes and roaring waves lashing out of the sea and engulfing buildings, it was pretty stunning stuff.

  If i was to pick my favourite of their albums i would go for ACHTUNG BABY, a change of direction for them at the time, but still full of great songs.

   And my acoustic version of ONE this year at the camp site got a few shouts of drunken approval when oen person actually shouted in the direction of our tent to ‘turn it up’. I can only come to the conclusion that they thought we had the ipod on and if that was the case then i’ll take that as excellent drunken compliment.

  I also like UB40s take on the whole reggae thing, and as well as having half a dozen of their cds, ive also seen them live one as well. A pretty surreal experience as it was sometime in the last 10 years at the Exhibition Centre and support came from The Pretenders, or Chrissie Hynde and whoever was left of the Pretenders, but both sets were great.

 Ive got 3 cds from Midge Ure, a guy who rarely gets the recognition he deserves, and has done a hell of a lot more, music wise, than most people will realise.

  By the mid 70s he was already topping the charts with 70s glam poppers SLICK, as well as being in the RICH KIDS. He actually auditioned for the Sex Pistols, but of course didnt look the part, and he toured playing guitar for THIN LIZZY at one time.

  As the lead singer with Ultravox he took them to chart fame during the 80s and also wrote and lent vocals to VISAGE including the classic FADE TO GREY.

   Of course everyone knows about his involvement with Live Aid and helping write Do They Know Its Christmas? and he also topped the charts as a solo artist in 1985 with IF I WAS. He even recorded a song with Thin Lizzy frontman Phil Lynott (YELLOW PEARL) which ended up being the theme tune for TOP OF THE TOPS for a while.

  I saw him playing live once down at the Magnum in Irvine where he played an excellent set mixing solo material with stuff that he had done with Ultravox and more. And Ultravox are back together and ready for touring next year, and by the time its over im sure colins borther Gus, if he hasnt got one already, will probably have a restraining order out against him for the safety of the band.

  Theres an Undertones best of, which amongst many other great songs features the late John Peels favourite single, TEENAGE KICKS.

  And i’ll finish off this short section with actress/comedian Tracy Ullman who turned her hand to singing for a bit in the 80s and churned out the pop classics BREAKAWAY, SUNGLASSES and THEY DONT KNOW and could well be the missing link between all those 60s motown, phil spector girl groups and the PIPETTES.

Alphabetisize!……………..T!

 TEENAGE FANCLUB are another of my all time favourite groups. Coming from Bellshill in Glasgow, they share a connection with the Beatles, not only in that there are 3 singer/songwriters within the band, but that they also make timeless beautiful music. With 8 cds of their music i have a great majority of their music, although im sure theres loads of early stuff, offical and unoffical, that i could still get if i looked in the right places.

 Kurt Cobain was fan of this groups music, as he was with quite a few scottish acts at the time, such as the Vaselines and the BMX Bandits and the best introduction to this band would definetely be with listening to BANDWAGONESQUE. Amongst many great songs on this cd is ALCOHOLIDAY, a song which i usually take great pleasure in crucifying with the help of an acoustic guitar whenever the opportunity arises.

  Seen these guys play quite a few times now, 2 or 3 times at T in the Park, a packed Barrowlands, the Mitchell Libraries and the Oran Mor and theyve always been amazing.

  On 6 cds each are TEXAS, TERRORVISION and TEARS FOR FEARS.

 Ive been a fan of Tears For Fears as long as ive been into music, THE HURTING and SONGS FROM THE BIG CHAIR are excellent albums. Theres also some good songs peppered amongst their other releases over the years. Roland Orzabel is a self proclaimed massive Beatles fan, and on their most recent album from a few years ago, this kind of shows. Because the album sounds like its been recorded by a big fan of the Beatles that basically sounds like Tears For Fears trying to sound like ELO who are trying to sound like the Beatles, but dont let that put you off.

   TERRORVISION were a great, good time rock band who had a knack for coming up with infectiously catchy tunes. OBVLIVION, JOSEPHINE, PERSEVERENCE and TEQUILA. At one gig they were handing out free tequilas to the peope in the front row which isnt really the wisest move when youve been jumping around, singing, and gasping for air for about an hour before hand. But i did manage to keep in down.

   Also saw TEXAS once and they do have a shit load of great tunes.

 TRAVIS are on 5 cds, which i would say THE MAN WHO is the best of the lot. Im sure i saw them live at the Tsunami gig at the Exhibition centre, but i couldnt (and wouldnt) stake my life on it. And drunkenly caught them at T in the Park when they were co-headliners on the sunday along with Green Day. I was pretty fucked by the time i got to withing hearing distance of them, but they were good. Although hearing them belt of NIGHT FEVER had me wondering ‘what the fuck was going on!’. Theyve always been good with a cover though and if you ever hear their version of KILLER QUEEN you would swear it was QUEEN that were actually doing it.

   THE THE are also on 5 cds, and were basically mainman MATT JOHNSON and a revolving set of musicians, who included at one point JOHNNY MARR. Theres a cd of HANK WILLIAMS cover versions which is actually very good as well as classic albums SOUL MINING (featuring the excellent ‘THIS IS THE DAY’) and INFECTED.

  TURIN BRAKES have some great songs scattered over the 4 cds i have of theirs and i have no shame in telling you i have THEN JERICO in my collection, although some of you may raise eyebrows at me having 3 of their cds. One of these is a cheap best of, and another is a cd released way after their hey day (did they have one?) when MARK SHAWS attempted solo career vanished before it even appeared to start. But the best of the bunch is THE BIG AREA cd, which is full of unashamed, over produced 80s pop. Im still scouring charity shops and bargain bins for their first album, so if you ever stumble across it, give me a shout.

 I would be as well getting this out of the way now…….i have 2 TAKE THAT cds. Im sure i never actually physically went out and bought them, it was more like when you never ordered something from that Britannia Music Club thing they would just send you something out anyway, and you usually couldnt be arsed sending it back. Thats how ive managed to end up with these cds. Honestly! And to be fair, they did write the odd good pop tune, BACK FOR GOOD was, and still is an excellent song, and who could resist drunkenly belting out A MILLION LOVE SONGS anytime it came on?

   Other atrists with 2 cds each are THERAPY? (screamager is still an fantastic song), TALKING HEADS, THE TEMPTATIONS (..’i know you’re gonna leaavvveee me, but i refuse, to let you go….’) and irish group THE THRILLS, whos gig at the Carling Academy years ago seemed to be like a blink and you’ll miss it affair. At one point we were ready to head into the venue when we realised chris wasnt with us and on returning to the bar we were in he was casually standing at a table, oblivious to the fact we had left the pub. This was the same pub, (if not the same night) that a karaoke was on while we were in. Never one to shy away from things like this i stuck my name up for ‘HUNGRY LIKE THE WOLF’ by Duran Duran, and felt that i wasnt THAT bad at it. Although the table of people beside us seemed to disagree. And they were DEAF!!!! (im not shitting you!). Half way through the song, there seemed to be mad waving of arms going all over the place at the table before they all got up and left. Cheeky Bastards.

  Anyway, on getting chris, we shot into the venue, saw the Thrills short set and were back in the pub in what seemed like less than an hour.

  “Were we just at a gig there?” someone actually asked.

 I got into the TRASHCAN SINATRAS through colin, who is a walking encyclopedia on this group. A band who have been around for about 20 years now and actually come from sunny Irvine, i was converted by the gorgeous sounds of their WEIGHTLIFTING album, which reminded me of very early, and very good era AZTEC CAMERA.

 Theres a THIN LIZZY greatest hits cd as well as the LIVE AND DANGEROUS one. ‘LIVE AND BLOODY LOUD’ more like, as we all found out one very early morning in IBIZA when alistair decided that a blast of THIN LIZZY would be the ideal thing to wake us up before heading, at a crazily ludicrious time with massive hangovers to the water park. Colin not only managed to be sick on the bus, but actually through a hole in the plastic bag that we had given him to try and prevent him from making a mess. He then flumoxed the driver by simply turning his hat round as a preplexed driver stood, scratching his head trying to find the vomitting culprit. Then on getting to the entrance to the water park, colin assured the guy dressed up as some cuddly animal character that if he even attempted to come anywhere near him to have a photograph taken he would ‘knock his head off’.  ROCK N ROLL my man, Phil Lynott would have definetely approved.

  The rest, as usual, are all on one cd each, such as the TREMELOES (here comes my baby is a top tune), the TEARS (brett and bernard from Suede), JAMIE T, TINY DANCERS, TLC (ive no idea why), TRAIN (and its not even the one with Drops Of Jupiter on it!), and TOPLOADER (jesus!).

 From the 80s theres best of’s from THE THOMPSON TWINS,  TALK TALK, THUNDER, TEARDROP EXPLODES and a solo album by Duran Durans ANDY TAYLOR.  Not his first solo album (which was called THUNDER and im still looking for on cd. ANYONE??) but a cover versions album called DANGEROUS, which im sure could be dangerous to your hearing if you were in the room while it was on.

  TERRIS were one of those bands i read about in NME who were gonna be, but never were, the next big thing. As like the 22-20s i cant really remember what these cds sound like so will maybe have to revist them again soon.

  Finally, THE TWANG. Now i bought this ages ago, in what i thought was a mad moment of bargain hunting for only £3, although many people would now tell me that the actual bargain would have been keeping the £3 in my pocket. Up till now i havent even listened to the bloody thing, and feel that may stay like that for a while to come.